Rescued…

“You call me out upon the waters
The great unknown where feet may fail
And there I find You in the mystery
In oceans deep
My faith will stand”
― Hillsong United

oceans

Sometimes I wallow,
wallow in pain,
in bottomless oceans
only the brave remain…

wounds widen, the hemorrhage is intense
I sink with the agony
of a rapid descent…
Crushed by a deluge
devoured by despair,
I struggle for breath, emptied of prayer…

With all strength depleted,
my body is weak,
in the consciousness of suffering,
its peace I seek…

Descending into journeys
of unraveled truth,
freed from attachments
in surrender
I conclude…

That I’m awoken by the crashing of unobstructed pain,
when flash-floods drown me
in bleak domains…

It’s under these waters,
that I see a faint glow,
and towards mercy, my spirit overflows…
Radiance dresses me
with benevolent care,
out of my body, I become aware…
of the courageous rescue
of my true self,
deep in dark oceans where the Divine dwells…

©Ally2019

 

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Reaping joy…

“Those who sow in tears will reap in joy”…
Psalm 126

sowing in tears

Her tears fell
like leaden showers,
sowing seeds
of pitiful flowers,
planted by streams 
with loving care,
she harvested them
in desperate prayer…

mementos
in halls of grief,
divine jewels
that held belief…

narrations of her sacred tears
where heavenly landscapes
drew near…

they grew from sorrow
yet contained joy,
blossoms that colored
her inner void,
and filled her life
with light and sound,
reflections of how grace abounds…

©Ally2017

Bride of the ocean…

Have you ever seen a beached jellyfish sadly waiting like an unrecognizable lump, trapped by sand, hoping the tide will return her to glory…

jellyfish

I found a jellyfish
stranded
and heavy,
motionlessly waiting,
with sand in her belly…

Imprisoned
and helpless,
gasping for her life,
almost forsaken,
her suffering denied…

like a wretched foreigner on alien land,
abandoned
rejected,
choked by hostile sand…

waiting to get back
to the liberation of the seas,
and dive into blue waters,
knowing
she’d be guaranteed,
the freedom of the ocean
away from all harm,
wholeheartedly
embraced,
by the most loving arms…

then the ocean rescued her, from her prison of sand
and beneath the surface
I glimpsed
a wonderland,
as she moved
with the breakers,
back to her fold,
no longer oppressed,
but completely whole…

dancing in the light of the incoming tide,
her train glowing
like a radiant bride…

image courtesy of PixaBay
©Ally2019

Lost…

“Live one day at a time. Keep your attention in present time. Have no expectations. Make no judgments. And give up the need to know why things happen as they do. Give it up!”
― Caroline Myss, Why People Don’t Heal and How They Can: A Practical Programme for Healing Body, Mind and Spirit

lost

Sometimes I get lost
out beyond the tracks,
heartache intensifies,
there’s no going back…
to expectations
or beliefs,
once held,
confessions of grief
my substance melds…

derailed by sorrow,
for it’s taken my life
in the midst of darkness
I’m dead inside…

and I surrender to Providence,
what must be,
acquiescing to the Universe
and what I can’t see…

hoping that dawn
will incinerate the pain,
pluck me
from the terror
of deadly domains…

Shine on my countenance
rewrite the script,
save me from the psychosis of feeling adrift…

©Ally2019

 

Grief’s Quagmire…

Day Eighteen…

“No one knows what has been taken from you
When the silence of absence deepens.”
― John O’Donohue, To Bless the Space Between Us: A Book of Blessings

mud

In a riverbed
flooded with tears,
caked with mud up to her ears…
she wallowed
and squelched
unable to stand,
in a morass of sorrow
she’d been damned…

And the sediment oozed, unraveling her might,
she’d been sucked under
by hostile blight…
she sloshed and waded
gasping for air,
screaming out from this boggy lair…

Longing
to escape
the quicksands of time,
she groveled in
unyielding grime…

And from
grief’s quagmire,
she watched the skies,
muddied,
besmirched,
she eulogized….
calling out in utter distress,
into dark mud
she coalesced…

The cool sludge
eased
her ghastly pain,
and sacred tears
merged
with healing rains….

image courtesy of PixaBay
©Ally2019

Evanescence

“These wounds won’t seem to heal, this pain is just too real
There’s just too much that time cannot erase”
― Evanescence, My Immortal.

the intensity of blue

I’m drawn into light
the intensity of blue,
letting it wash
over me
and call me into view…
To allow particles
to evaporate,
evanescing
in stillness
of a perfect escape… No longer remembering
the terror
of defeat,
just a little soul searching
to choreograph
relief…

©Ally2019

 

Mystical immersions…

“My heart is so small
it’s almost invisible.
How can You place
such big sorrows in it?
“Look,” He answered,
“your eyes are even smaller,
yet they behold the world.”
― Rumi

light

Broken in pieces,
on the dark side of the moon,
just a cacophony of irrepressible tunes…
My song is over
the crowds have gone home, shattered, 
bludgeoned,
exposed to the bone… In crypts of longing,
I recounted my fears,
of sacred ceremonies
of sanguine tears… Basking in the resplendence of
Illuminating light,
bent forwards,
I surrendered to the night… Reconciling the struggle of my soul’s journey,
to mystical immersions,
of being set free…

©Ally2019