Sleep walking…

sleep walking

Insensate disturbance
down the rabbit hole
formless abstractions
out of control

In corridors of oblivion
dolorous                  shadows walked
insomniac outlines
where apparitions     gawked

Unreal       deductions                      of a befuddled mind
garbled visitation
reality undefined…………………

A shrill starling woke me
in the soft morning light
breaking the spell
of a fragmented night!



Starlight reporter..

“Don’t underestimate the healing power of these three things…….Music, the ocean and the stars!”― Anonymous

starlight reporter

I’m a starlight reporter,
when twilight calls,
the mystical lingers while darkness sprawls…

I see the new moon rising and the evening star,
I wish upon belonging,
from ever so far….

and Venus is rising,
night descends,
a glory like no other,
a Cosmos without end…….

My senses are alive in this ambience of night,
magical elements,
that all will be alright!

And as I search the skies for lucent shooting stars,
I glimpse eternity,
on pathways beyond mars!

The backdrop of heaven is a radiant glow,
abundant luminosity
reminds me of what I know….

….that the Milky Way outshines
my temporal maladies,
while Electra winks from a faraway galaxy……………..


in the night….

Sometimes the night radiates through me,
and clanks open

darkness isolation
I’m distracted by the tonality of darkness,
the isolation.
I squint,
to observe
of lucidity.

Blizzards of desolation
my unbidden thoughts.

I’m perturbed
by mournful vibrations,
and I long
for images of another world.

In soporific state,
I forget
for a moment
that light
been here
transform me.


Father’s Day

“What I really want to tell him is to pick up that baby of his and hold her tight, to set the moon on the edge of her crib and to hang her name up in the stars!”
― Jodi Picoult


Yes, I’ve had dreams of you,
in tranquil shades of wordless wonderment,
where forgiveness brought me to my knees,
released this captive,
broke the chains.

I needed you to behold my countenance,
with parental pride,
to call me lovely,
and though I dissappointed you
my penance has been too long!

In pity now I fly,
back to where the bond
was shattered,
and here I am with heart in hand,
my subliminal memory
knows your sorry woes.

On the ground of instability,
you failed to recognize my worth,
but light has an immensity of healing,
no bitterness
darkens me.

On this day to your remembrance,
I’m free,
I’ve touched your immortal soul.
In reveries,
suffering is vanquished,
beyond the realms of lucid visions,
I dreamed you were watching over me…

Oh stars that shine,
you enabled,
to carry out my request,
and in the moon’s hallowed light
I see your eyes
proclaim me worthy.

Your pride outspoken in my dreams!


Everlasting Jubilee

“Our death is our wedding with eternity.”
― Rumi

Today we set my son’s ashes free into the ocean. It was a spur of the moment thing.
The day was magical and the ocean was warm..

a soul set free

The ocean received your body,
waves absorbed my tears.
I heard your song of freedom
whispering in my ears.

As you dance in cosmic vistas,
far from Earthly pain
your spirit keeps on soaring;
remembrance forever remains.

There are no goodbyes in heaven,
just a lucent diaphanous veil.
I touch you with my spirit
as though I’m interpreting braille.

Your path is festooned with flowers,
as far as the eye can see,
in a star bedazzled universe,
everlasting jubilee!

festooned with flowers

and as we drove home, this magnificent creature honored us with his presence….

a horsie



“For what is it to die but to stand naked in the wind and to melt into the sun?
And what is it to cease breathing but to free the breath from its restless tides, that it may rise and expand and seek God unencumbered?
Only when you drink from the river of silence shall you indeed sing.
And when you have reached the mountaintop,then you shall begin to climb.
And when the earth shall claim your limbs,then shall you truly dance.”
― Kahlil Gibran, The Prophet

a rembrance

It’s six months ago today that you went
back to the light,
to your true home.
I’ve thought about you every day since then.
I’ve set an intention to heal,
and even though I will never be the same,
I choose to honour you
with my life.
I will hold the memory of you
in my heart,
until we meet again
in paradise.

I’ve read books about grief and near death experiences,
trying to find my way into the realm where only joy exists,
that place where you now live.
I’ve joined the army of parents
who know this indescribable pain of loss.
I’ve cried until every part of me hurts.
I’ve questioned every one of my beliefs.
I’ve even stormed the gates of heaven to find you.
I’ve been to hell
and now I know it’s not a real place,
because God is love and He would never
torture those whom He loves
for eternity.

I have seen you in my dreams,
I won’t let you go,
you know me like that!

I’ve been led to people of light who have suffered
and survived,
wounded healers,
whose one desire
is to make this world a better place!
I’ve lit candles every Friday for the last six months.
I’ve pasted your picture on walls.
I still have some treasures that belong to you as a reminder
of how precious you are to me.

And in the stillness of the night,
I hear your voice,
reassuring me that you are still here,
watching over me.
You’ve held my hand
when I was at my lowest ebb,
and it was real!

I’ve searched the sky, the grasslands,
the forests, the rivers, the lakes,
and the ocean shore for signs of you
and you’ve sent me many gifts of love,
signs that no one can take away from a grieving parent.
But I don’t expect those who don’t know this pain
to understand.

I’m living now in a realm between two worlds,
a place occupied by Angels,
where iridescent light shines eternally.
And when living on this planet gets too hard for me to bear
I close my eyes,
and I see the inner light of glory,
the Kingdom of heaven.

I promise you that I will keep watch while I’m asleep,
and dream while I’m awake.
I don’t want to miss a thing.
The goodness and comfort of God surrounds me,
with a love that cannot be measured.
In the meantime I’ll keep forgiving
as you would want me to.
I’ll allow myself to be vulnerable
hey, it’s a beautiful thing
to be human the way we are meant to be,
just like you were
while you were here on Earth.
Your legacy is one of generosity and light.

You’ll be glad to know that I’ve tuned out the naysayers,
they are background noise to me now,
and those who pass judgment have been brought to their knees
in the presence of such grace.
You have done your work here on Earth
and I can hear God say
“good and faithful servant
in spite of your pain
you loved
and you forgave!”

You didn’t pass by the homeless
or the broken,
you looked into their eyes,
the way the master did while he was here on Earth
and you had great compassion!

So, as long as I have breath in me,
I will keep on keeping on
and I will take just one day at a time!
I will forever honour your memory,
and be thankful for our time together.
You and your brother are the bravest humans I have ever known.

My beloved son,
I will always be proud to be your Mother!